Hypersensitivity and Overeating

Kids, kids, kids, I've got a problem! I can't stop eating! Yet again my stomach has decided to stop communicating on when it's full or hungry, and I'm also having issues with hypersensitivity. No Fun!

Somehow, I've lost control with my eating. I just keep eating and I keep wanting more and different things. I wish I could figure out what it is that my body needs because the overeating needs to cease and desist. To put things in perspective, lets chronicle what I have actually consumed today:

Breakfast: Bowl of cinnamon oat crunch cereal with raspberries and rice milk
Snack: Chips and salsa, roast beef, salami, and something else I've forgotten
Lunch: Bowl of homemade collard greens, potato, and tomato soup, half of a roast beef sandwich on flaxseed bread
Starbucks: Grande non-fat decaf vanilla cappuccino
Snack: Orange, bread with olive tapenade
Starbucks: Venti half caf non-fat vanilla cappuccino
Dinner: Another bowl of soup, two pieces of flaxseed bread with dark chocolate peanut butter, honey, and brown sugar, and a small serving of chips and salsa.

Seriously, it's way too much food. And I still feel like I could eat more if I wanted to (which part of me does). And the whole thing upsets me because in many ways it puts me right back where I was a year ago... mindlessly overeating to fill some unknown void in my life.

Aha! But perhaps I am on to something. Maybe it's not so much that I'm deficient in a nutrient or protein of some sort, but there is something else that I am trying to fill, an emotional need. But what? It's so hard to put your finger on it, you know?

Come to think of it, the overeating started a good month ago when I was stressing out pretty good when I had an reencounter with some toxic people that I had removed from my life. Maybe, I haven't fully recovered and moved on from that event. Just thinking about it now brings up some pretty intense emotions, so maybe I really am on to something. Strange how just writing out a stream of conscienceness (sp?) can bring out these types of revelations...

I might need to spend some time meditating to clear my head of the demons that have taken hold of it. Earlier this week I was talking to someone about meditating and I think that would be good for me to take up, and I think now might just be the time. Hopefully, when I am able to become more centered with myself, clear the toxicity from my mind, I will be able to regain control of my eating and binging. A mental "cleansing" should do me some good.

Anyway, to go along with my overeating, I started having hypersensitivity issues again. For the past few days my lips and mouth keep threatening to swell and get hivey. Yesterday I almost went to a complete full-blown allergic reaction, but it went away quickly. After that short episode I decided to air on the side of caution and wipe down the whole desk area in the case that some massage oil (made of almonds) or snack almonds (that my coworker STILL leaves at her work station even though I frequently end up at her work station helping patients) got on anything. The weird thing is that 95% of the time I'm fine and have no problems working around that stuff, but all of the sudden I will get these hypersensitivity flair-ups and get the random mild, short-lived, lip and throat swelling. I don't get it. Maybe it's a reaction to the overeating? Who knows!

What I do know for sure is that this post was a very long stream of conscience. But, hey, it's my blog, I can do that, right? :)