Not quite with it lately.

I feel an overwhelming amount of, what I would call, "phantom" stress lately. It's been manifesting itself every which way and the result is that I am completely exhausted- mentally, emotionally, physically. To cope I have, as I always use to, been turning to food, which is not good. Last week, I had more Starbucks than I have in the last few months combined and by the end of the week I was drinking venti cappuccino's instead of the healthier, more digestively friendly, and less caffeinated iced green teas. Every cappuccino gave me that old familiar high and sense of relaxation though, it made me feel calmer and less agitated, despite it making me shaky and dizzy later from the caffeine, sugar, and dairy combo. By the end of the day Friday I was completely hyped up on caffeine, sugar and dairy, crashed almost immediately after work from exhaustion, but couldn't sleep because the caffeine was still having it's affect on me.

So, I'm not feeling completely with it. The stress is making my tummy turn and my head feel funny, but, thankfully, there has been little to no gallbladder activity.

I realized the other day that it is the peak of summer, all of the fresh fruits and vegetables are coming available, and I have no interest in eating them. Can you say stress? All I want is caffeine, sugar, and dairy- as we have already concluded- and additionally protein and fat with a little bit of carbs. It's the weirdest thing and I'm not feeling as though I have the energy to combat the food cravings and to force myself to eat healthier again. I have managed to keep portion size in control though, so I've at least got that going for me.

I need to work on strategies to destress and to refocus my energy... mainly, so I have more. The exhaustion is killing me! My therapist gave me a fun exercise to play with silly putty to help me destress. It is surprisingly effective. I got really nauseous the other night while discussing some stressful things with a friend. It just happened to be the day I got the silly putty, too. I got off the phone with her and determined the nausea could be due in part to having discussed the stressful "trigger" topics we had been talking about. Pulled out the silly putty. Well, whaddya know? Within five minutes almost all of the nausea was gone. Who knew silly putty could be such a powerful thing?

Tonight I need to play with the silly putty some more, I think. Off, I go... silly putty, read, maybe a long hot shower, and then bed. Need to rest up to destress!

Growing food and doin' a whole lot of nothin'

Well, it's been... a few...weeks. But better late than never!

The last two weeks I've been on a mission to do nothing. Absolutely nothing. Exhaustion from over committing and over socializing finally caught up and the hubs and I decided to spend some quality time being hermits. It's been wonderful. Fourth of July weekend kicked it off, and we spent all day the 4th watching movies and doing a whole lot of nothing. It was a rainy, dreary day, so that worked in favor of our goal of doing nothing, we didn't even go out for the fireworks. The rain had cleared by then, only misting occassionally, but we still didn't feel obligated to move from our comfortable positions on the couch. I think the most movement we did that day was to do a yoga video for about thirty minutes, just for the sake of movement. On the 5th we did decide to spend the morning cleaning the house, then we quickly resumed our couch potato status to finish out the weekend strong.

Last weekend we pretty much did the same thing, though not quite as many movies. Mostly computer and video games. Feeling a bit more relaxed and refreshed, and while I wish it could last longer, it's time to move on with life.

Speaking of, we finally started to harvest from our garden! We have harvested a batch of green beans (which I may or not determine to be allergic to in the near future, the verdict is still out, though things did not go well the other day with that batch or an item I got from a restaurant earlier in the week), and we've harvested a batch of cucumbers as well. The cucumbers are just fantastic. I've been enjoying them in sandwiches for lunch the last few days, and today I decided to add a slice of salami (my latest obsession) to the mix and it was divine. Can't wait to eat another for lunch tomorrow!

So I've got some new pictures of the garden to share that I took earlier this week. Who knew growing your own food could be so fun and fascinating!?

Starting to get strawberries! As of today, one is almost entirely red and ready for me to eat!

Between my two plants I have about four peppers growing, and many blossoms starting to show. Yesterday my husband and I noticed that our hot peppers were starting to get some flowers too, so we are excited for chilis and serranos to come soon!

The butternut squash plant is about to overgrow it's container. It looks really neat. Plus, I noticed the first tiny flower bud today! I love butternut squash. I can't wait to make lots of stocks and risottos and soups!

It turns out, when you grow cucumbers in a hanging position,they start to look like this. I kind of think they are cute. Didn't taste any different either, and that's what matters!

Still waiting for the tomatoes to turn red. Lots of romas working their way out!

And finally, the green beans. Not sure what I was having an allergic reaction to, so I will have to do a food challenge next time the crop is ready. They are part of the legume family, so there is a possibility that allergy is finally manifesting itself, but I'm not so sure. I'm wondering if the sauce on the ones I ate at the restaurant earlier in the week didn't have some fish sauce or something on them...

Vegan Red Velvet Cupcakes

Last week at work was my bosses' (plural, husband and wife own the business) wedding anniversary. Apparently, red velvet cake is her favorite thing and they had it on their wedding day. So all of us chipped in and had a red velvet cake made for their anniversary, and, naturally, they shared a little bit with us before taking it home for the evening. It was good, and the baker is a patient at our office who has a small home based bakery business so I know it was made with real high quality ingredients.

Here is the problem with red velvet cake-- massive quantities of red food coloring. Not natural. So I was thinking to myself, I wonder if you can make red velvet cake with something other than food coloring? Did some research and come to find out red velvet cake was traditionally made with beets to get the red coloring. Farmers would get rid of some of their excess beets by using them in this unexpected way. The natural sweetness of beets lends itself to desserts in a way, but dessert is definitely not the first thing you think of for them. Well, at least I don't.

I searched the Internet for recipes using beets and stumbled upon a vegan recipe. Jackpot! Not only could I eliminate the red food coloring, but also the eggs and dairy which don't do well with me... eggs especially lately, I'm putting them on the do not eat list for a while. Anyway, I had a bunch of beets in the fridge and whipped them up. The result was beautiful.

Look at that color!

I attempted to make a frosting to go with it, but didn't have quite enough powdered sugar for the job, so ignore how weird the frosting looks. Funny enough, I found that I actually enjoyed them more without the frosting. I will say, as well, that next time I am going to measure how much beet I put in, because I think I might have done a bit much. They are quite beetlicious on the first bite, but after that the chocolate does start to come through.

After making these (and devouring them) I'm starting to wonder what other fruits/veggies I can make in to vegan cupcakes. These were so good, I'm sure other variations would work!