I survived the Chili's chips and salsa

Last night my carb cravings got really bad. Thankfully, I have a wonderful husband who went and got me some chips and salsa from Chili's at 10pm in response to this uncontrollable craving (probably, mostly to shut me up and stop whining, but that's alright). I ate the chips and salsa and it tasted so good. The chips are definitely not on the gallbladder friendly diet (they are made with corn and that is a huge no-no food) but at least the salsa was, so I justified eating it in my carb-craving head. Followed the chips and salsa up with some green grapes and took my gallbladder/digestive supplements and all was well. No nausea, no indigestion, no heartburn, no nothing. Sweet. Chili's chips and salsa are in.

What did upset my digestion the last few days were two rice dishes that I ate. Last night I had my favorite Sushi Popo vegetarian combo for dinner and something was not right with that rice. My husband even noticed it in his dish. Had some not so pleasant indigestion with that one-- I kept burping it up and it didn't not taste quite as good the second time around. But, hey, the chips and salsa got rid of it, so it's all good. Today I ate some leftover mango salsa and basmati rice and that gave me some very mild nausea that was just noticeable enough to be annoying. Luckily, dinner went over very well with my tummy-- homemade summer vegetable soup filled with tomatoes, onions, zucchini, yellow squash, potatoes, basil, and a little bit of Parmesan cheese. It was awesome. And despite it being vegetarian, my husband lapped it up like it was going out of style. He likes my cooking, what can I say?

Again, I hate my camera and the lighting in my apartment. Someday I will have a nice new camera that takes awesome pictures of all my food, no matter what the lighting.

As a side note from my diet, I did something good for my mental well-being on Friday-- I got a fancy new haircut. I love it and I think it's a great reward for all the hard work I've done over the last seven or so weeks. Check it out (ignore my messy bedroom, I have since cleaned it up).

The Lure of Chocolate Fondue

Last night I enjoyed an evening with some good friends. We ate dinner at Sushi Popo (my favorite- got the Vegetarian Combo like usual), and then decided to go down to the riverfront for drinks. I was good and stuck to my water, though the wine smelled amazing. What I wasn't so good on was resisting the chocolate fondue. I swore I was only going to eat the fruit, but ending up dipping everything in the amazing Belgian chocolate.

The restaurant where we went is called Water Street Wines, Cafe, and Coffee. http://waterstreetcoffee.com/ I wish I had my camera with me to take pictures of the tasty goodness, but wasn't carrying it around.

Now, ask me if I paid the price for eating chocolate, a serious gallbladder no-no food? Sure did, but not as bad as I would have thought. I woke up at about 3:30am with some mild nausea, but nothing so bad that I couldn't go right back to sleep. Didn't have to resort to sleeping sitting up on the couch, so I think we are making progress! I think it was worth it.

Not eating chocolate is near impossible for me though! I had to put a napkin over the top of the leftover fondue to keep from licking it all out of the bowl. The chocolate addiction is gonna be a real hard one to break!

Food Allergies

I realized the other day that I still haven't chronicled on here the joy that are my many food allergies. I guess it's probably time... especially since now that my digestion is back in somewhat of semblance of order there isn't always exciting things to report every day.

I have a lot of allergies. Hence the fact my friends always laugh at me and say I should live in a bubble. I laugh along, and I never take offense to that sentiment. I've learned to live with my allergies and have been doing allergy shots for the past three years to get rid of them. The one thing you can't get allergy shots for though is food sensitivities/allergies. Allergy shots can get rid of environmental allergies (pollens, molds, dusts, pet dander, etc), but not food allergies.

Most people are born with food allergies. I was not. The only food allergy I had growing up was pumpernickel bread, and even that was more of a sensitivity since I don't get full fledged anaphylaxis or vomiting or anything exciting like that; I just get really swollen lips with hives. Granted, it ain't comfortable, but I was always thankful with that one that I didn't have the anaphylaxis. My baby brother is deathly allergic to raw egg, peanuts, and shellfish and he does get anaphylaxis, and I also have an uncle whose whole face swells when he eats strawberries and a few other foods. So, food allergies do run in the family but my baby brother was the only one of my siblings to be born with them.

I first started to develop food allergies in the fall of 2002. Every time I ate carrots, peas, or apples my lips would swell with hives and my tongue would start to tingle horribly. By the spring I had added tree nuts to the list, and all of this was confirmed when I starting seeing a new allergist who did a scratch test on me to see what foods I was allergic to. Believe or not, it wasn't until the scratch test that it dawned on me that I was in fact having an allergic reaction when these things happened. I'm a bright one, I know.

From then on I seem to continually develop more and more food "allergies" to items which were staples in my diet. Eating out is always an adventure, though most restaurants are accommodating whenever possible (which is good). Try ordering a salad at a restaurant nowadays without carrots in it. The waiter looks at you like you just asked them to do back flips down the aisle or something. Everything is premixed, and my food allergies are to very common foods that are way beyond the usual "nuts and shellfish." Funny enough, I had one waiter once who didn't flinch when I asked for a salad with out carrots, and it turns out he had a friend who was also allergic-- that made me feel good, sad but true, cuz at least then I wasn't alone! Anyway, as of today I have a very long (and ever growing list) of food allergies. Here it is:
Carrots
Apples
Peas
Beans
Tree nuts (but not peanuts)
Cantaloupe
Honeydew melon
Cherries
Raw Egg
Raw Fish
Shellfish
Sulfites (so no wine, and no bread from Subway)
Subway (something they put on their vegetables I think)
Pumpernickel
Kashi brand foods (not sure what the allergy is to, but I can't eat it)
Soymilk (I think)
Soybeans (I think)
Any fruit that is not organic
And probably a few others I forgot about

The list is long, needless to say, and quite random. All of the reactions are the same, but vary in degree of severity: hives on my lips, tingling throughout my mouth, hives in the back of my throat (sometimes), and feeling like my esophagus is swelling or spasming.

So, how did this all come to be? The timeline of when I developed all of these problems directly coincides with when I was diagnosed with GERD and put on Nexium. No joke. About three months after being on the Nexium was when the food sensitivities began. After about a year on that stuff with no results I switched to OTC antacids (Prilosec OTC, Zantac 150, usually), and I used them fairly consistently up until last month. There was a short time in 2003-2004 when I had gotten most of the GERD under control by using natural supplements (Aloe Vera, enzymes) and avoiding trigger foods (chocolate, caffeine, anything acidic, especially tomatoes), but that was short lived since the GERD kept popping up again and again. Funny thing is, I have a girlfriend who ended up with a similar outcome after being put on Nexium and she didn't last nearly as long as I did on it. Doesn't it seem odd that food allergies would have popped up for both of us after using it? I think so.

I still need to do more research in to the subject, but I think that the gallbladder might have something to do with my it because GERD usually happens when the stomach is having trouble digesting or is overwhelmed with food it can't digest. Sure, acidic food can play in to it, but that wasn't entirely the case for me. I wonder if the GERD was my body's way of telling me something- screaming at me to stop eating so much and eat healthier food. Here I am now, not quite two months in to my gallbladder friendly diet and I have not taken a single antacid since I started (and there have only been a very few occasions where I even thought I needed one). I wish the Traditional medicine community would get get together with the alternative medicine community and start sharing these stories and do some research in to what the root of these diseases are and how to treat them naturally without resorting to pills. I mean, think about it, why should we take a pill that pretty much stops digestion completely????? And why would a doctor want to prescribe that willy-nilly? It doesn't even make sense! Yeah, heartburn sucks (preaching to the choir), but look at how much eating a whole foods diet changed my need for heartburn pills... I'm just sayin' is all.

BTW I have learned that diseased gallbladders can also be a sign of food allergies/sensitivities, such as gluten and milk. I am going to get myself tested for both in another couple of months and see if that might be part of why I have such bad gallbladder problems at such a young age. I am all about getting to the true root of the problem and want to exhaust all possibilities so I can prevent it from happening again!

Best Meal Ever

Tonight I was finally able to personally cook some of the recipes out of my new Indian cookbook and BOY OH BOY!!!! Quite possibly one of the best meals ever.

First let's start with the amazing smells. One recipe called for freshly ground coriander and when the smell started to overtake the kitchen my senses came alive. The smell is abosolutely amazing, and difficult to describe- though it definitely had a hint of lemon or lemongrass type scent to my nose. Plus the smell of the tadkas-- Indian sauces that are prepared with onions, oil, and spices over a high heat before the actual main food item is introduced-- was intoxicating and the whole apartment smelled amazing.


There were two dishes I made tonight for the meal. The protein portion of the meal was a baked halibut in a broth of shallot, coriander, cayenne, ginger, and garlic, topped off with tomatoes and cilantro. Can you say flavor? My friend and my husband absolutely devoured this dish (I ate the other one first, so I didn't eat quite as much of the fish, but it was really good).


My photo doesn't look near as good as the one in the book (especially with the awful yellow lighting my dark dark kitchen). Either way you get the idea. Look at all of that flavor!

The vegetable dish was a ginger lemon sweet potato, and this was to die for. In love is all I have to say. The flavor explosion was borderline orgasmic it was so amazing. The tadka was made with red onion, turmeric, mustard seeds, serrano chili peppers, and ginger, and then the sweet potato was added and steamed quickly with everything and then right before serving you mix in some freshly squeezed lemon. Amazing doesn't even begin to describe how wonderful this dish was. The recipe was an absolute keeper. I can't wait to eat the leftover for lunch tomorrow.

Again, crappy lighting, but you get the idea. The picture in the book does much more justice.

And who says healthy eating has to be boring? Right?

The only part of the meal that did not follow with my dietary restrictions was the onion, but it's kind of a necessary evil in most cooking. Usually the onions don't bother me, but like I mentioned in a previous post I am more sensitive to the onions now than I have been in a while. I can smell the onions coming of my pores (which is a bit funny when I get a whiff of myself!), and I have a bit of gas indigestion going on. The way I look at it, that's a small price to pay for such a wonderful meal! There is no gallbladder pain, so I'm cool with it.

Maybe I'm not as bad as I thought I was

Yesterday I blogged about some events that happened at work and how they effected me greatly and how hard it was to let go of things sometimes. While this still holds true for me, my gut proved itself right today. The intense feelings of unease I was having were justified and my primal instinct was correct. After a series of events that unfolded today- starting with finding out what had really happened after piecing the puzzle together- I ended up taking action and saying something like I had wanted to from the beginning. In some ways, I wish I hadn't waited until the end of the day today, but then again, if I hadn't my story might not have been as strong a case to rectify the situation. Still not 100% sure everything has been resolved, but I did my part and can really move on now.

This brings up another interesting issue that I have been investigating in regards to mental health. We have trained ourselves to ignore our primal instincts- telling ourselves that we are just imagining things. You hear stories all of the time about how people sense something bad is going to happen right before it does, and when they react on that primal instinct the end up saving their lives or preventing that bad thing from happening. Now, this situation was clearly not life or death, but had I believed my gut reaction that something wasn't right it could have prevented the whole series of events from actually happening. I personally have had other times in my life that I convinced myself that I was imagining things or I was the crazy one and that there was nothing wrong. In some cases this turned out to be quite traumatic for me and I am still suffering the consequences it has had on me since. From my own story and the stories I have heard from others I wonder why we don't spend more time getting in tune with our body's natural primal signals. Not so long ago, I am certain I saw Oprah do an episode on just that subject. It's great what she has done to cause more awareness of this subject, but I wish there was more. We need to learn to pay attention to the hair raising on the back of our necks, our heartbeat quickening, our eyesight becoming extremely focused, and that general sense of unease. Our bodies are speaking and too many of us don't listen or react.

In other news, my acupuncturist told me today that I am a "rockstar" since I am doing so well. He said I only have a slight fold in the left side of my tongue and everything else has cleared up. How exciting is that?!?! And it seriously only took just under three months to clear up years of problems. Natural medicine stimulating the body's ability to heal itself is amazing to me and I wish it were more mainstream in American culture. The results cannot be ignored from where I am sitting.

Learning to Let Go

Part of our health and well-being is our mental health. For me, this is something I have been striving to obtain for many many years now. After eight years of therapy I can say that I am making great strides, and am happy to report that I discovered earlier this year that I'm not the crazy one (in most cases, anyway), but I'm actually rather normal. My biggest issue is that I am a very sensitive individual and after having suppressed this side of myself for so long (28+ years) I am finally starting to learn how to be my true self without becoming the "crazy" one.

Now, I am a sensitive person, but not to the point where I cry at the drop of a hat or take offense at everything. No, I'm just your basic everyday living breathing sensitive person who has a good heart and wants to believe that others have a good heart too. My sensitivity comes to the forefront when I am treated wrong or disrespected, and for a long time now that has caused me to react with a lot of anger. This stems from a lot of things, and by removing the source of where the anger and frustration started I am actually doing much better than I normally would be. However, I do get my feelings hurt in a big way when someone doesn't treat me as I would like to be treated- especially if it is manipulative or abusive in any way (that's when I really get upset). In all fairness, my sensitivity is normal or should be normal, but in today's society we are taught to not have feelings and suppress emotions. Yeah. After 20+ years of that I discovered that wasn't work so well for me and was actually making me one of the "crazy" ones.

Anyway, today I had a coworker really treat me in a manner that I felt was dismissive, manipulative, and rude which caused my sensitivity to boil over. When I told my coworkers something didn't feel right early on, they all assured me that it was probably just in my head and things were fine, agreeing that I was probably reading in to it too much. Then I got a whammy where my gut was right and the situation panned out in the way I hoped it wouldn't. The coworker who mistreated me was one who I never pinned for being that kind of person, and I'm still not sure why things had to play out the way that they did. Perhaps I am naive in assuming that people can be straightforward with each other. Maybe I'm totally disillusioned in this matter, and maybe I'm completely missing the boat altogether. Thankfully, I have a wonderful therapist and friends who reassure me all the time that when these things happen I'm not being crazy and completely over-sensitive.

The largest probably for me is learning to let go of those negative experiences. It takes me a long time to move on from those hurt feelings and stop talking about it. Sometimes it feels as though I have to vent a certain number of times before the "ick" is out of my system and I can drop it. Sometimes, it just takes a conversation with the offender/instigator to get a better understanding of where things went wrong. Either way, I'm not one of those people who can just move on with it as though nothing happened right away. I wonder if it's something in my DNA, or better yet, something in how I was taught when I was growing up. I believe in a lot of ways I was taught to hold on to my anger, frustration and hurt, and in some respects I taught myself how to hold on to it because they were the only true feelings I had. It's just so hard for me to move on, as much as I desperately want to.

With this situation, I have to move on and stop wasting energy on it. I have one week left at that job, and in the grand scheme of things it really only makes it easier to leave that job. It doesn't make me feel any better about it, but there are times when I have to learn to let go and stop fighting. I've spent so much of my life fighting for people to treat each other nice and I haven't gotten very far with that battle. This is one fight that is not worth my energy at this juncture, but had I been staying at the job I would have fought it hard.

I'm going to learn to let go slowly but surely. It's just going to take a lot more time to break my body and mind of their old unhealthy habits.

Backing Up

First I want to start out today's post with some lovely food porn (I use this term loosely of course, but it's so tasty looking how could you not want a piece?).



Tasty looking, right? It was a little creation I whipped up the other day with some left over veggies I had and one of my new spices. I know it's not a super complex, fancy recipe, but it sure does taste good. I used red peppers, baby bella mushrooms, spinach, extra virgin olive oil, and my new Sunny Paris Seasoning (see previous post). The flavors are light, but quite good. The meal itself--which I combined with quinoa, also seasoned with the Sunny Paris stuff-- is quite filling and satisfying. The best part for me is that it's chock full of iron from the quinoa and spinach. When you are eating a primarily vegetarian diet, that iron/protein thing is super important, especially for women.

Speaking of, I've noticed something these past few days. (WARNING: For those who don't like the discussion of bodily functions or women's things, do not read on) I am in the "PMS" stage of the month and really took note of how my body, and especially digestion, has changed just these last few days. Looking back, I realize that this is something that happens almost every single month without fail, and always has. Furthermore, these changes coincided last month with when I felt as though I was set back in my progress and was experiencing lots of nausea again. Interesting.


Anyway, the major change that happens for me during the week before my period is that my stomach stops sending signals to the rest of my body. I don't get hungry, I don't get full. Seriously, I know it sounds weird, but it has always been that way for me when I have PMS. As a result, I have a harder time gauging how much I should eat and even when I should eat. Since I don't get physically hungry in the sense of my stomach growling I have to listen for other cues from my body, such as feeling faint or light headed. Fun. Otherwise, I would just not eat, but I know that when I start to feel kind of "off" in that way I need to eat- despite not feeling hungry. The hardest part by far is figuring out when to stop eating. I literally have to go strictly off portion size and hope I got it right. Usually, I think I end up eating too much, which is not good for my gallbladder or stomach at all. But if I don't eat enough? Yeah, then I feel slightly hungry a few hours later, accompanied with the lightheadedness. Double fun.


I'm not sure why my body reacts in this way. I don't have any theories to explain it, but I guess it's just hormones, right? Then I look at the other side effect-- slowed digestion and constipation. Gross, yes, but I warned you! I have been so constipated feeling the last few days, even though my diet has not changed at all from what it was the week before when I was digesting quite well, thank you. Sure, I still go #2, but it isn't as easy and takes a heck of a lot more effort. And compared to the number of times I did go #2 the last few weeks, we are severely cut down. According to my acupuncturist and all of the natural medicine sources I have read so far, we should actually being going #2 more than once per day with normal digestion! That was mind blowing to me! Nonetheless, I would at least like it be easy to go again like it was last week. I wonder if I do a liquid diet this week if that will help move things along? Maybe I should try!


Figuring out all of the little nuances of my body is a very interesting process. I have never listened to it so much and really taken in all of the subtle changes that happen and thought about why they happen. I am learning more about myself than I ever thought I would!